An Unusual Position

Sometime today, I think this afternoon, I will be attending a party. I'm not exactly sure who will be there. I'm not sure where it will be held. I don't know the kind of food available nor the entertainment nor the proper way to dress, even. You see my family is indulging me by throwing a party for me. I haven't had a birthday party for some time. Our daughter and my hubby planned it along with some help I'm sure from son and son-in-law. I know my sister and brother-in-law will be there as well as my younger brother. Oh, and Mom and step-dad. I think they will have left the dog home, but I really can't be sure of that.

I'm a little nervous and of course, feel somewhat guilty at the same time. Nervous as I always am when I don't know what to expect. Guilty because I asked for this outright. I didn't hint or give sly clues. Of course, originally I was going to plan it, which meant I had some control over the contents. But our daughter who is filled with so much love for her family, took this on with the hubby that I confess can be something of a wild card, if not channelled into more conventional ways. They are off doing something or other as I write this.

My family is everything to me. My hubby, whom I frequently needle in this venue, but whom life would be desolate and maudlin without. Our son, so handsome and caring, so sure sometimes of what he wants while struggling to do the right thing-which may NOT be what he wants. Our daughter, who makes me gasp at her beauty both in and out, who believes strongly in justice and you can never have enough cats. Her husband who has been so very caring this week as she struggled with vertigo while putting the finishing touches on her Mother's whim. My sis, my buddy, my traveling companion/planner, and my best confident who knew me when we shared a room, a bathroom and an occasional box of tissues. Her husband, who might as well have been born into the family, he's so much a part of the fabric--he makes me laugh, he hugs me when I need it and listens when I try to work something out. My younger brother whom is such a kind and kindred spirit, that even when not having a conversation, we can guess what we are both thinking. My mom, I am so blessed for having this woman be my mother and my friend. And my father of step who laughs with me at the things we both do--mom and I! And my older brother, who I miss almost all the time, if I give myself  into it. Who is facing some horrifically sad stuff right now. I wish I could hug him and his wife, but they know, they know. All of these people love me and will be there. I'm excited to be with them and share laughter and conversation.

But it's a surprise mostly who will be there. An unusual position for me.